You know the rest!
My first four novels were written straight from the heart, with no real reflection involved until they came back from my beta readers. Hell, I didn't even know what a beta reader was when I wrote my first one (and second), so I had hardly any input from anyone until my little darlings were ready to fly. I trusted my instincts and for the most part my betas were happy with what I produced.
Then I write my fifth novel, and just as I'm starting it I come across Scribophile. And what a fantastic group of writers they are! They've made me a better and more thoughtful writer, and I can't thank those of them who critiqued my rabid scribblings enough.
But now, like a child with the bike stabilisers removed, I need to let go and trust my instincts again. I'm starting to lose my way and my focus by trying to please everyone. I'm getting sucked into revisions of early chapters before I've gotten even half the book written. One person loves a particular scene, someone else has a constructive comment. Which is all well and good until yet a third person has a different comment about the same scene, and I end up chasing my tail trying to do the rewrites and it becomes a mish-mash of everyone else and nothing of me.
So what I'm saying is, join a writing circle, let others help you with the process, but don't lose sight of the bigger picture - your story.